A.,
I didn't want to type this. It seems almost petty compared with everything you've done for me as an admissions officer. But... it's bothering me, so here goes.
I'm perplexed by your assertion that I should automatically have a single. Sure, you were probably surprised when I asked how your college treats trans students, and I thank you for not being outright rude about it, but really. How is it possible that in an entering class of over 300 there's not one person who could deal with me as a roommate? Am I that frightening? Sure, I did mention that i like to look up strange things on the internet, and my mention of Exploding Head Syndrome might have been off-putting (The head doesn't actually explode, if that's what shocked you) but I'm really a very nice person.
I know you treat singles as a special privilege that few students get. The fact is, though, that I would like the chance to share a room with a friendly peer. All of my past experiences with roommates have been positive even after coming out. Well, except for the Fundamentalist, but our problems were based on religious differences, not gender. Please, don't assume that just because I'm "different" I would frighten others away.
When I visited your school last week I did some talking to your students. Many of them brought up the topic of trans rights all by themselves, and were universally supportive. The prevailing attitude couldn't have been friendlier. Seems you're wrong that single housing is a must for me.
I know that you're not in charge of housing, but you do hold some influence. If you could be so kind as to not display your personal biases - however benign they may be - when discussing these matters I would appreciate it. Also, please do not assume the worst of people before you know them. My guess is that the incoming class will be more open-minded than you.
See you around campus!
-Tobias
((To those reading this - I have not sent the above note, although I do intend to speak with the person in question once I start at the school. Just for fun, though, since aside from that remark she's really quite nice.))
So, did they actually deny you a roommate because of this? I think part of the dorm experience is getting to see firsthand what different lifestyles and cultures are like. I would call it discrimination as well. I say "Send the letter!"
A 5 all the way from me!
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I haven't updated this, but my billing sheet indicates that I'm getting a double, which could mean a roommate. As to what sex/gender, no idea, as they haven't contacted me. But things are looking up!
Thank you!
T.k.
That's great! I'm sorry that you had to feel this way during the whole experience! Someday all people will be more accepting of others.
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Thanks for the support. I've been flipping through your blog, and, um, do you mind if I friend you?
T.k.
Of course I don't mind! I'll return the favor. I'm surprised that I haven't added you already. I kinda go add crazy when I find someone whose work I like to read.
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