so im reading this very interesting book that analyzes pop culture and american lives and values called Sex, Drugs, and Cocoa Puffs by Chuck Kholsterman. Behind the profanity and some of the explict material...it actually has substence oddly enough.
For instance, he gives this scenario....Ok two people, whom we will call person a and person b. Person a is extremely successful and very attractive. Person b is extremely succesful, very attractive, and patriotic. Which person would you choose to date and why? Along with many other people, I picked the first one. I guess I have a negative connotation about the word patriotic. My friend picked person b and she said she thinks of patriotism as voting and supporting your country. However, I view it as extreme patriotism. I never look at it as just something that is kind of a grey area. When I hear patriotism...I think of the extreme. Like too much...I'm imagining red,white, and blue outfits all the time, waving american flags. Which is weird.
He also talks about how no one will ever statisfy him for once. And honest, will someone ever statisfy one person completely? I truly don't think so. There is always going to be something that you don't like about someone. Something you wish was different. Because if anybody gets on the pedestool that meets your high standards...you make the standards higher. You find new things that you want in a person that you had never thought of before.
Nobody will ever statisfy anybody because as americans...we crave perfection. we want our perfect lives. our perfect images. and families. and cars. and careers. and relationships.
and I just said "and" a lot.
And that is just the way it goes. Kholsterman also says the most interesting thing I have heard in a long time. He says he has all of his old love letters from failed relationships that say how he would always love them and he would never leave and this and that. He says the things he hates the most about those are the fact that they are not false. He hates the fact that they were completely true at one point, but they faded into nothingness and accidental lies.
accidental lies. this is my favorite. we all ironically have accidental lies. we never meant for them to be lies...they just turned into lies. and when you think about your individual accidental lies it almost breaks you down to the things you failed at. Am i right? How can you possibly be happy that you were so convicted of feelings at a certain time and you let it turn to nothing. you let that happen. accidental lies...they make the world go round....
and will someone please explain something to me. I have yet to find one guy tbat can explain something to me that I just completely do not understand. okay, so why is it that guys always use the infamous excuse that they "Do not want to be tied down. They just don't want a girlfriend, they wanna have fun."
Uhm I dunno what kind of girlfriends you boys have been having...but apparently many do not view having a girlfriend as fun. So your girlfriends must suck. And honestly you guys make it out to seem that girlfriends complicate things and make things so much harder....
how? I don't understand that. I think being in a relationship makes it so much easier. You have someone that is always going to be there for you. And so what if you are single and can kiss more than one girl....please do not tell me that this is honestly statisfying to you. If i could have 20 guys that I could kiss because I am single...or one kiss that means something, that you feel something....i would pick the one in a heartbeat.
Sure it's exciting for a while...its a rush to get so many. But so many people have negative views on relationships apparently. The term "tied down" speaks for itself. The way you guys talk...it makes it seem you think being in a relationship is this bad thing. Why? What is so bad about caring about someeone and them caring for you back?
I just don't get it.
Someone please explain it to me. I mean in the beginning especially, the relationship should be fun because its a rush of falling for each other. It should not get to be something you have to work at until later. And guys are like "ya but i just wanna hang with friends right now". ok, most of the time when you like someone....YOU WANNA HANG OUT WITH THEM! So you guys are scared. You are insecure and worried that you might actually wanna be with someone. It will break your security of you and your buddies hangs out. You will HAVE to hang out with your girlfriend some. Oh wow guys...are you that pathetic. If you guys really dont have a good time with your girlfriends and you would rather be with the guys all the time....turn gay. plain and simple.
hmm. im getting tired again. i think im going back to bed for an hour....expand on my thoughts. i need new perspectives.
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I read that book... it was interesting.. but I what I got out of it was completely different then what you did. We did it in a Modern Culture & Media course, and I think everybody walked out with a totally different perspective.