I would like to call your attention to a wonderful blogger in our midst. We are all well aware of the issue "Evolution vs. Creationism" or whatever the hell. Our very good friend Darwin's Beagle has a stance on the issue. He has made a point of hammering this down over and over...and over...and over...and over. It is also very obvious that he hates the bible. This is also something that he repeats over and over...and over...and over. People worshipping the bible? People screw dogs. People write about pissing competitions and dehumanizing fetuses. People are gay wiccan priests. People listen to rap. Why does worshipping the bible offend? Very strange.
Now for a poem:
As we bow before the dead man
who once said I was a monkey
I really should be laughing
but I can't find it to be funny
I crave lots of bananas
and beat on shit
I try to climb skyscrapers
and chuck fruit pits
But now we see the high priest
of our sacred order
He is but Darwin's pet
a Beagle........right
So we wonder once again
how far our species fell
since we used to pound bananas
and pick the fleas off of each-other
I know this doesn't rhyme, but I'm getting drunk again.
There isn't enough alcohol in the world
to make me forget
that I used to be
an
ape.
Somebody get me a banana.
Sorry, I had not realized that you had written anything about me until a few minutes ago. I want to thank you for the amusement. It is amazing the pleasure that so little talent can bring.
A few comments.
(1) Unlike some, I think if one is going to do a blog, one should write about what one knows or is very interested in.
(2) One can believe anything one likes. That would include worshipping the bible. In fact it includes any silly-assed belief one may want to come up with. I would never dream of advocating anything different. However, one is not entitled to have their particular silly-assed belief exempted from criticism. That includes worshipping the bible.
(3) You were never a monkey. Your ancestors were. But your ancestors who were monkeys were the exact same individuals who were my ancestors as well. You would be better described as a jack-ass.
(4) Darwin's pet dog was a fox-terrier named Polly. She died a week after Darwin did. While one cannot know why, the family seemed to think it was due to sorrow over Darwin's death. The HMS Beagle was the ship that Darwin sailed on his around-the-world trip with Captain FitzRoy.
Darwin was never comfortable being the center of controversy. It would make him physically sick. His friend, Thomas Henry Huxley, took up the mantle of defending Darwinian evolutionary theory before the public. In doing so, he garnered the nickname of "Darwin's Bulldog".
Richard Dawkins, is one of the staunchest defenders of Dawinian evolutionary theory today. He has been referred to as "Darwin's Rotweiller".
I chose my nom-de-plume in deference to Huxley and Dawkins along with the historical significance of the Beagle and the fact that when I was growing up we owned beagles as pets.
Cheers,
Darwin's Beagle
Woof!
I think there is no one who would actually claim to worship the Bible. The accusation is just another of several straw men that extreme critics like to assail knowing victory is assured.
The wonder is that there are those who so venomously and irrationally attack the most published book in the history of mankind. The Bible is sort of the classic of classics in literature. When one evaluates a classic, it is the classic that actually evaluates that person. For instance, if one thinks that Beethoven is dreadful music, the classic nature of Beethoven judges that person's taste in music much more than that person judges the music.
On the other hand, because the Bible provides behavioral boundaries which offend the critic who would like to condemn all boundaries, it is no surprise that the critic is willing to go to extreme lengths to condemn the Bible.
I cannot deny that many attack the Bible because they see some bible-believers acting dreadful. Actually, it is those acting dreadfully that should be condemned, not the Bible. For example, if my 4 year old plays a melody of Beethoven's dreadfully, that might bring critics to condemn Beethoven. But the truth is that Beethoven's is still excellent music, it is just that my little girl does not do it justice. I am among many who do not do the Bible justice. Many thanks to Extreme Unction.