Why are so many people looking towards retirement? I cannot see anything good coming out from it. You do not do anything but spend money on yourself. For once in my life, I fear growing older. Actually, I fear the feeling of uselessness.
My nanny lives in Thailand. She is like a grandmother to me. We still talk to each other once every month for the past ten years since I've moved to America. Yesterday, she was feeling down because her illness is beginning to take control of her body. I do not know the name precisely in English. But it is a disease that makes her legs numb. She can hardly move or walk. My nanny said she mostly stays at home. She lives with a step granddaughter who is about my age. There are only the two of them. Her sons are working out of the country and they send her money once in a while. However, she told me countless of times that there is nothing she wants more than her sons being with her in the house. The medical bills are really expensive too. She feels as if she is living day by day because of the medicines the doctor gives her.
Her step granddaughter is going through college applications process. My nanny is afraid that if her step granddaughter gets where she wants to go, my nanny would be left alone in the house. This is where she told me she does not want to live anymore. She cannot do anything and she loses all of her passions. Her friends and siblings are already gone. She feels sick and lonely...
What do you tell elders like her who do not want to live anymore?
I understand that if this was about a teen or a younger adult, we would have countless of things to say to cheer them on. Life for them is just a beginning. But life for an elder, it's starting to end. They have been through it all. So, why do they have to live on? They do not have the strength to do labor work. Their speeches and memories incline dramatically as they age. Thus, they become useless...don't they? How can elders still make a difference in the society when they have already done so much when they were younger? What can they do now when they can hardly move, hear or speak?
I can only tell my grandmother how much I love her. Even though I do not know when I will see her again, hopefully, she will live a little bit longer for me.
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Growing old and watching others grow old is tough. But it is something that has to happen. I wish that if an elder person wanted to die and is in poor health they should be allowed to take a pill and die in their sleep.
I know it's tough, but stay encouraging to your Nanny. Good luck.
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"I am a Stephens Woman."
http://progressiveu.org/blog/ashestree
Thanks. What you said sort of reminded me of Terry Schiavo's case in a certain way. The difference is that my grandmother is still breathing and all. If they can choose to take a "death" pill, do you think there will be a lot of elders who would do it? I'm sure people would like to die painlessly. I'm not trying to figure out my grandmother, but I'm trying to get through to all elders who might feel the same way. Because I love my grandmother I can tell her to live on for me. But what about elders who are strangers to me? What can I possibly do? Or should I just let them go?
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